Can We Use Mediation In A New Jersey Family Law Case After A Final Restraining Order?
Answer
In most cases, yes. Mediation can be a beneficial way to resolve family disputes, such as those between divorced parents. With the right help, you can use it even after a final restraining order has been issued in your case. I have special training that allows me to mediate effectively in such cases.
It may take shuttle diplomacy. If you have a final restraining order, you’re generally supposed to stay away from the other party. There are exceptions, but you may still feel that it would be most effective to communicate through a third party. That is possible, either using videoconferencing or physical separation.
What Is Mediation?
Mediation is a dispute resolution process that people can use instead of fighting a battle in court. A neutral mediator listens to the parties and helps them to communicate effectively so that they can develop a solution that they can both support. Unlike a judge, a mediator doesn’t make rulings or choose sides. The mediator’s job is to help ex-spouses come to their own resolutions.
That’s important because people are much more likely to follow an agreement if they helped set it up. Mediation is usually less expensive and less adversarial than going to court. In addition, parties can usually schedule mediations right away, while court hearings could be months away. If the ex-spouses prefer, the agreements they come to in mediation can be made into court orders.
The Challenge And A Couple Of Solutions
Mediation can be more complex when there have been allegations of domestic violence. If you have a final restraining order in place, you may have concerns about engaging in mediation. You may have fears for your safety. You may believe that you have been unfairly accused. In either case, there likely has been a breakdown of trust.
Zoom meetings or other videoconferences have been a great new way to deal with these issues. If you and your ex can tolerate being in a videoconference together, then you may be able to take part in a relatively standard mediation. You would each explain your situation and goals and the mediator would listen and set ground rules for negotiation. They can make suggestions, but they won’t make rulings.
In other circumstances, the mediator may want the parties to come to the office but be kept separate. That can work well. At my firm, for example, you would never have to be in the same room with the other party. We have separate entrances, separate conference rooms and separate pathways through the building so you and the other party would never need to bump into each other.
Whether mediation takes place on a Zoom call or while you’re physically separated, your side will be heard. Often, a mediator’s first goal is just to listen to each party fully before the negotiations even begin. This involves hearing each side out to a grasp of their pain points and concerns. Then, the mediator reports those concerns respectfully to the other party and listens to their side before carrying that information back to the first party.
Reaching An Agreement Is Possible After A Final Restraining Order
Everyone deserves a fair hearing. You also deserve to receive a resolution to your dispute that you can support.
Mediation can be a powerful tool. It can help you and your ex (or other family member) minimize the conflict and keep your dispute out of court. Even when you have a final restraining order in place, mediation can help you come to a resolution to your dispute.
The answer is intended to be for informational purposes only. It should not be relied on as legal advice, nor construed as a form of attorney-client relationship.
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