My nickname is … I haven’t had one since grade school, when my pals extended my name to “Toddles” or “Toddy-Potty.” I am not bitter.

If you were in my office … you’d become overwhelmed by nostalgia at my collection of antiquated tech, and slink out in shame after being beaten at Galaga. 

If I weren’t a lawyer, I’d … be a writer of some kind, which actually means I would be a mall Santa.

The movie line I quote most often is … “Like I told my last wife, I says, ‘Honey, I never drive faster than I can see. Besides that, it’s all in the reflexes.’” – Big Trouble in Little China

My colleagues would be surprised to know … that I despise creamy dessert items.

When I was a newbie lawyer I … practiced law with just a Dictaphone and a bad haircut.

The three people I’d invite to dinner are … C.S. Lewis, Jesus and Bruce Lee: legendary philosophers and butt-kickers all.

The lawyer I most admire is … my partner Gary Hanson, the archetypical Kansas lawyer—always hard-working, helpful and patient, but ready to throw down when the swords come out.

The quality I most like in a lawyer is … a sense of humor. It exponentially decreases my chances of getting beaten by a briefcase for my offhand comments.

My career high point (so far) has been … a tie between two appellate arguments/briefs in the Kansas Supreme Court and the 10th Circuit Bankruptcy Appellate Panel.

The last TV show I binge-watched was … Iron Fist.

I can’t believe more people haven’t read … Starship Troopers by Robert A. Heinlein. Watching that joke of a film does not count. 

I can do a pretty good impersonation of … Tie—Wallace Shawn in Princess Bride; Marvin the Martian.

My fictional hero is … Captain James T. Kirk: drop-kicking alien butts and stealing Orion slave-girls’ hearts. 

My real-life hero is … my dad, who helps me out whenever I call, and who is still the guy I have to try to
keep up with on the projects we do. 

I get angry when … coworkers cut communal doughnuts in half. Commitment, people. Go big or go home. 

The craziest thing I witnessed in a courtroom was … my opposing witness, a divorcing husband,
referring to a prostitute as his “sexual acquaintance.” 

If I won the lottery I’d … hire someone to worry for me, and then lay awake at night concerned that they weren’t doing their job.

My courtroom walk-up music would be … “You Sexy Thing.” Nothing says legal competence better than a sweet ’70s bongo groove.

A recurring dream I have is … second-chairing a big-time deposition with multiple parties where the other attorney blows it off and drops it on me. 

My motto is … Amat victoria curam—Victory loves preparation.