What Are Legal Alternatives to Marriage?

Use these links to jump to different sections:

• Seeking Legal Alternatives to Marriage
• Domestic Partnerships
• Civil Unions
• Common Law Marriage
• Cohabitation Agreements
• Comparing Legal Rights and Protections Across Alternatives
• Practical Steps and Legal Documents
• Find Legal Advice

In an evolving social and legal landscape, alternatives to marriage are important for couples seeking official recognition and protection without the formalities of marriage. Legal alternatives such as domestic partnerships, civil unions, and common law marriages provide valuable rights and protections for couples who wish to formalize their commitment without traditional marriage.

Each alternative has unique benefits, responsibilities, and limitations, making it crucial for couples to explore these options thoroughly and consult with a legal professional if needed to ensure their relationship is adequately protected.

Seeking Legal Alternatives to Marriage

Several marriage alternative options are available to couples looking to formalize their commitment to each other. A couple should consider their relationship, current situation, and what they hope to gain by formalizing their relationship. This isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution. 

Marilea Lewis is a top-rated family law attorney working at Duffee + Eitzen in Dallas, Texas. Her experience includes serving time as a judge in a family court. She explains why someone would choose a marriage alternative. “People who want to keep all of their property separate would not want to get married now. There are ways to keep your property separate, but the easiest way is not to get married. Some people choose not to get married simply because they don’t want to be married. Some people have the mindset that marriage is restrictive and that just because their parents got married doesn’t mean they have to.”

Domestic Partnerships

A domestic partnership is a legally recognized status that unmarried couples can claim. The couple must live together but have not obtained a marriage license. They typically have similar legal rights as married couples. Domestic partnerships usually require registration through a local or state authority and often require both partners to be of legal age, cohabitate, and be financially interdependent. Depending on the state or locality, domestic partnerships may allow partners to:

• Make medical decisions for each other in emergencies.
• Receive health insurance benefits through a partner’s employer.
• Inherit property without a will, similar to a spouse.
• Access visitation rights in hospitals and correctional facilities.

Domestic partners often share responsibilities similar to spouses, such as joint financial obligations, liability for certain debts, and property division rights upon separation or death. Rights associated with domestic partnerships vary significantly by jurisdiction and may not cover all legal areas as comprehensively as marriage does, especially regarding federal benefits like Social Security. Requirements can include proof of cohabitation, minimum age requirements, and showing that neither partner is currently married or in another domestic partnership.

Oregon and Nevada offer domestic partnership registries with similar rights to marriage for opposite-sex and same-sex couples. Washington limits domestic partnerships to couples over 62, allowing older adults to maintain certain benefits while gaining relationship recognition. Colorado allows designated beneficiary agreements as an alternative, letting unmarried partners choose specific rights for healthcare and inheritance without full domestic partnership status.

Civil Unions

Civil unions were originally introduced as a way for same-sex couples to gain legal recognition and protections when marriage was not legally available to them. The first U.S. state to recognize civil unions was Vermont in 2000. A civil union is a legally recognized arrangement similar to marriage, offering certain legal protections and obligations but not as comprehensive as marriage, especially at the federal level. Rights may include inheritance rights, health benefits, property rights, and the ability to make medical decisions. However, civil unions do not grant federal benefits (e.g., tax benefits, Social Security survivor benefits).

While many states transitioned from civil unions to marriage equality following the nationwide legalization of same-sex marriage, civil unions remain available in some states for both same-sex and opposite-sex couples who prefer a legal alternative to marriage. Some states allow civil unions to be converted into marriages if the couple desires. In states where civil unions are no longer offered, existing civil unions may still be recognized, allowing the couple to maintain their status with the same rights granted previously.

New Jersey allows civil unions that grant nearly all the same state-level rights as marriage, including family leave rights and protections under anti-discrimination laws.

Common Law Marriage

Common law marriage is a form of legal recognition of a relationship without a formal marriage ceremony or marriage license. Once established, common law marriages grant couples similar rights and responsibilities as traditional marriage. Generally, couples must meet specific criteria, which may include:

• Cohabiting for a significant period.
• Presenting themselves publicly as a married couple (e.g., referring to each other as “husband” or “wife”).
• Demonstrating intent to be married through shared financial arrangements, joint property ownership, or having children together.

Ending a common law marriage requires a legal divorce in states that recognize it, as the couple is considered legally married under state law. Only a limited number of states currently recognize common-law marriages, including Colorado, Iowa, Kansas, Montana, New Hampshire (for inheritance purposes only), South Carolina, and Texas. Additionally, some states honor common law marriages established in other states.

Cohabitation Agreements

A cohabitation agreement is a legal contract between two people who live together but are not married, outlining each person’s rights and responsibilities within the relationship. It protects each partner’s assets and clarifies expectations, especially in areas like finances, property, and support obligations, in the event of a breakup. While not as formal as spousal support, some cohabitation agreements may outline terms for financial support, often called “palimony,” if the relationship dissolves.

A cohabitation agreement provides couples with protection in states that do not recognize common law marriage. It also provides a framework for resolving disputes, helping couples avoid litigation when separating.

Although cohabitation agreements do not override wills, they can clarify each partner’s intentions for inheritance, encouraging partners to update wills or establish trusts. Cohabitation agreements generally do not cover certain legal rights exclusive to marriage, such as tax benefits, spousal Social Security, or inheritance without a will. Given the complexities of drafting an enforceable cohabitation agreement, consulting a family law attorney can ensure that the agreement meets state requirements and adequately protects each partner’s interests.

Comparing Legal Rights and Protections Across Alternatives

Having a legally recognized relationship gives couples valuable life benefits, one of the most important being medical and health decision-making rights. These rights typically require explicit legal documentation, such as a healthcare power of attorney (POA), to grant authority to decide on behalf of an incapacitated partner. Hospital visitation rights are generally extended to legally recognized partners (married couples, domestic partners) but may not apply to cohabitating couples without formal agreements.

Lewis explains that couples should consider the consequences of agreeing to a cohabitation agreement. There are pros and cons that could have great consequences in the long term. “If they’re in a cohabitation agreement [in Texas, for example], they’re not going to have community property, so they’re giving up their right to claim community property. If a spouse has some separate property that they agree is separate—let’s say they have an investment account and continue to make wise investments, and the account grows to be worth $9 million instead of the $9,000 it was worth at the time of the agreement—the other spouse has just effectively given away whatever they could have presumptively claimed as community property.”

Child custody and support rights can vary significantly based on the legal relationship status. Biological parents generally retain rights regardless of marital status. Child support obligations exist for both married and unmarried parents. However, the process of establishing paternity may be more complicated for non-marital partners. Spousal support (alimony) typically applies only to legally married couples. Non-married partners may need to rely on cohabitation agreements for financial support.

Generally, tax laws favor married couples, allowing joint filing and tax benefits that may not extend to domestic partners or civil unions. Inheritance rights often require a will for non-married partners; without one, state intestacy laws may not recognize non-marital partners. To ensure asset distribution according to their wishes, estate planning is essential for all couples, especially those in non-marital arrangements.

Practical Steps and Legal Documents

When a couple decides to formalize their relationship, the first step is to decide what method best fits their needs. Consulting with a lawyer can help them understand the options available to them in their state. An experienced family lawyer will explain what the state recognizes and the legal rights that come with each status.

After deciding which option is the best one for them, they may need to file paperwork. Couples typically have to file a declaration of domestic partnership with the appropriate local government office. Depending on the state, this could be the local clerk of court or the Secretary of State. There is typically a standardized form and a filing fee that gets submitted.

Instead of officially filing with the government, a couple may need to prepare necessary legal documents. A family lawyer can prepare the documents for the couple. Similar to other legal agreements or contracts, the couple will then sign the agreement.

If the couple agrees to be in the relationship, they can maintain their status. However, a couple may decide to separate and end the relationship. In this case, they would need to formalize the separation. A couple may need to file a petition with the court, similar to a divorce. Courts may require mediation or negotiation of asset division and child custody arrangements.

Find Legal Advice

Choosing the right legal arrangement for a committed relationship is a significant decision that goes beyond the traditional boundaries of marriage. As more couples explore alternatives to marriage, understanding the legal protections associated with options like domestic partnerships and civil unions becomes essential.

By understanding options like marriage, domestic partnerships, civil unions, common law marriage, and cohabitation agreements, couples can find the most suitable path to securing their relationship under the law. These alternatives offer flexibility and valuable protections but require careful planning and documentation to safeguard the relationship fully. To ensure maximum protection and clarity, couples should consider consulting with a legal expert and using essential documents like prenuptial agreements.

Visit the Super Lawyers directory to begin your search for an experienced family law attorney.